How to Reduce the Divide between Disabled and Non-Disabled People
by Joe Olvera, El Paso, TX
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It's not easy being disabled, yet it amazes me the way some people with extreme disabilities continue the struggle to become accepted members of society. It isn't easy, you know. Some Americans are fearful of disabled persons because they don't understand what it means to have a disability. This is true because disabilities come in all colors, in all sizes, and create different challenges for different people.
All too often, people who are not disabled tend to ignore or shy away from those of us who are disabled. Whether the disability is blindness, being deaf, having problems with mobility – such as amputations – or whether they suffer from debilitating illnesses such as multiple sclerosis, or other life-threatening illnesses, the disabled community becomes almost an invisible community.
Reaching across the divide of discomfort
As we progress through 2006, we must remember that disabled persons truly struggle to survive in our society. Yet, there is a tendency on the part of many to believe that those with disabilities want to be left alone, that they are reluctant to discuss their situation. In most cases, nothing could be further from the truth. The reality is that we tend to ignore people with disabilities simply because they make us uncomfortable. Whenever we run into one of them, we tend to look sideways so that they can't see that we're focusing on them – that is, if they can see at all.
There is a rather macabre attitude that some people exhibit when faced with the prospect of dealing with someone who has a disability. There is nervousness, an inability to confront the issue. What many Americans don't realize is that the disabled are simply people who have different abilities. They may not have the same abilities as those who are not disabled, but they have abilities nonetheless. Our job as a society is to recognize and understand the different abilities that are exhibited.
Projecting fearlessness, plunging ahead
It always amazes me when I see a blind person walking down a city street. This individual may be blind, but you wouldn't know it by the way they carry themselves. They are absolutely fearless, and if they are afraid, they hide it very well. They take on the challenge of walking on a busy city street, as if there was nothing wrong with them that a cane or a guide dog can't fix.
I know whereof I speak, because as a disabled person myself, I have seen first-hand the way some people look at me. They have a great deal of curiosity when they see me walking not quite right. Although I try to walk without a limp, it's not easy to do. My prosthetic leg tends to not follow my body, or my other leg so that sometimes I spin completely around without meaning to. Thus, people look at me funny.
Taking the opportunities to educate children
Children, of course, are the worst culprits. They look unabashedly at me and stare at my leg.
Whenever possible, I try to show them what they want to see. I'm not ashamed, and, in fact, it gives me the opportunity to provide some much needed education. I do show them my prosthesis. Recently, a group of youngsters who were playing at a department store stopped suddenly when they saw me limp into sight. They weren't laughing or pointing fingers, they were merely curious.
So, I sat down and called them over. I asked them if they wanted to see why I limped. They all nodded yes, but not quite sure. Okay, I said to myself, you asked for it. So, I lifted my pants leg and showed them my prosthesis. I could hear wows and whispering, as they struggled to understand. I asked them if they wanted to see more, and, again, they nodded yes uncertainly.
This time I removed my prosthesis so that they could see what was left of my leg. Again, I could hear whispering and wows of amazement. You see, I told them, this happened to me because I didn't take care of my diabetes. If you have a mom or a dad with diabetes, make sure that they take care of themselves because this could happen to them too. Soon the children, resilient as children are, grew bored with my leg once they saw what it was all about. They went back to playing their game and ignored me from then on. They had seen, they had understood and they had grown bored.
Tackling fears, one American at a time
Thus, it behooves those of us who are disabled, whatever that disability may be, to educate our fellow Americans. People want to understand, but they are fearful. I guess the fear comes from the adage: "There, but for the grace of God, go I." But, yes, it could happen to them as well. In fact, it could happen to anyone of us. I never thought I would one day be an amputee. But, I am. Anything's possible in this world.
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