The Fefes is a group made up of young women with disabilities. The Fefes came into existence six years ago when several female high school students expressed desire for a peer group to discuss topics of interest to them.

The young women met at Access Living, a Center for Independent Living in Chicago, IL. At their meetings, the FeFes talk about typical teen stuff including crushes, fights with friends/boyfriends, sexual urges, their parents not understanding them, etc.

This was a radical change from what they were accustomed to, being treated like helpless children. For instance, FeFe Kristal Martinez says her mom and step dad never talked to her about sex. One time, her step dad wondered aloud whether she had "desires" like other people. He seemed to be asking more to satisfy his own curiosity than out of any concern for her well being.

FeFe Maria Herrera knows what it is like to be treated like she was not a young woman. Herrera´s mom didn't talk to her daughter about sex either, nor did she talk about sexual desire, romance, good versus bad boyfriends or how to handle relationships or breakups.

"Many times people with disabilities are perceived as non-sexual beings," said Herrera, 26, who has been in the FeFes since the group's inception. I didn't know I could be sexy or romantic until I joined the FeFes. Thanks to information I got from the support group I have a renewed sense of self-esteem and source of information about sexuality and reproductive health.

That's exactly the kind of comment FeFes founder Susan Nussbaum, a purposeful woman with a head of wild curls, likes to hear. Nussbaum said, "My intention has always been for the group to primarily address the lack of sexual information available to young people with disabilities." She attributes the dearth of information about sex to a prevailing attitude of paternalism toward disabled people. "A young woman grows up with no input anywhere about her sexual identity, no sense that she has the ability to engage in a sexual relation, to be in control of her body, to make good choices and decisions," Nussbaum continued.

As a staffer at Access Living, Nussbaum got the group going through visits to Chicago high schools, where she spoke to co-ed groups of disabled students. She asked students to write their names and phone numbers on a sign-in sheet. After the meeting she called the girls to see if they wanted to participate in a meeting about sex. A few took her up on the offer, and soon others followed.

"First, they go over the nuts and bolts. We talk about how our bodies work, and that people with disabilities can be capable of mental, physical, emotional pleasure," says Nussbaum. They do blackboard work, placing parts of the body magnets on a human torso magnet. They practice putting condoms on zucchini. One time, they even visited Chicago Women's Health, a health center organization for women that has a sex-aid store.

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