One Family's Experience with Disability, Independent Living & Latino Culture
by Sarah Vazquez
(left to right) Workshop moderator Marisa Ortiz-Rentería, Independent Living Projects Specialist, San Antonio Independent Living Services, with panelists Mary Elizabeth de Ferreire, Founder, International and Multicultural Psychological Services and Barbara Duncan, Director of Communications, Proyecto Visión. |
Many Latinos in the United States stay true to their cultures, especially, those who travel from native lands and settle here. As for Latinos born and raised in the United States, it is often the role of their elder family members to uphold cultural traditions. Latinos in general preserve their culture by involving themselves in the richness of their foods, music, language, and religious beliefs often shared among family members. Hence, strong familiar ties are created. However, how does having a family member with a disability tie into this blissful Latino culture?
Disability & family dynamics
Sometimes the individual with a disability learns that due to a disability, they are perceived as "different" within their own family. On the other hand, there may be protective and/or overprotective behaviors on the part of family members towards the person with the disability. There also are family members who may shy away from the situation because of their lack of understanding of disabilities in general.
In the Bridges to Employment Conference: Exploring Career Opportunities for Latinos with Disabilities which was held in San Antonio, Texas on May 31-June 2, 2006, the dynamics of the Latino culture and disabilities were discussed by the panel entitled "Intersection Between Latino Culture and Disability." The panelists shared stories about being Latino and having a disability. They spoke openly on their experiences with employment, education and family and community life.
The panelists, made up of Latinos with different disabilities from Texas, were open about what had occurred in their lives as a result of having a disability and being part of a culture that is not always open about disability issues.
Differing views from mother and son
Mary Ann Pompa-Valdes and her son, Guadalupe Gabriel Montez, were the first panelists to speak about their experiences. What I found most striking about these panelists was that one learned two different and quite distinct perspectives concerning the fusion of the Latino culture and being a person with a disability.
Pompa-Valdes stood up straight and proud when speaking. Her tone was strong and full of conviction. She did not show hesitation in talking about how she had to face a family that did not fully understand her son's disability. Pompa-Valdes is one of 10 children in her family but often felt a lack of support from her family. She explained how her family members did one of two things: ignored or pitied her son.
In addition, when it came to advocating Gabriel's right and choice to live independently, Pompa-Valdes' family considered her to be irresponsible for allowing her son, who uses a wheelchair, to live on his own. This illustrates an unfortunate phenomenon – that, at times, the feelings of a person with a disability are not taken into account. Members of the family unit who don't have a disability often believe they know what is best for the individual with disability. This takes away the person's freedom of choice. However, Pompa-Valdes remained strong in her ideas about her son being an independent person, who wanted to live on his own. Pompa-Valdes struggled to overcome her own overprotective tendancies to help her son achieve the level of independence he desired.
Gabriel, Pompa-Valdes' son, then gave his version of their family history and his fight for independence. His viewpoint was perhaps difficult for his mother to hear, but very typical for a young man of his age. Like most 19-year-olds, Gabriel wanted to live away from his parents because he felt it liberated him as a human being. He wanted to make his own choices. Gabriel explained how he knew that his mother would always be "Mom" and because of that, she would be protective over him. In addition, when asked what was the most important factor of his independence, Gabriel's response was, "I want to be treated like a human being."
Furthermore, Gabriel has moved away from home but has not removed himself from his Latino culture. By way of his Personal Assistants, who make home visits and help with personal care needs, Gabriel is able to have extended family. They also join Gabriel in celebrating Latino culture during holidays.
The family ties between this mother and son are very close despite their differences. They have had to find their way to understand each other's struggles. Pompa-Valdes has come to the conclusion that her own family members were not going to see Gabriel in the light that she grew to see him in. She, as well, had to loosen her overprotective armor and had to learn to respect Gabriel for the individual that he is. By the same token, Gabriel had to comprehend that his mother would always be concerned with his well-being. The highlight of this family story is that Gabriel was able to make his own choices and received what we all want and deserve: to be treated human beings.
return to Bridges 2006 index
printer
friendly format |
